Friday, February 29, 2008

What a week

Emotions have been all over the map this week. I have to realize, I guess, that that is normal. Sometimes I have experienced an overwhelming sense of loneliness, at which time God has come in and shown me His loving kindness. Dealing with issues that George and I would have solved together, or I would have let George decide on his own now fall on my shoulders to deal with. These things sometimes stop me in my tracks because I want to take into consideration what I think George would do.

The cemetery installed the headstone to mark the grave site. I went to see it the other day and the site looks horrible. We have had so much rain that the dirt is washing out around the site and there are holes and weeds growing on the sight. This almost sent me over the edge, knowing how George was about making sure the yard was nice and his love for the soil and all things dirt. I asked the cemetery to please make sure they resolve this issue ASAP. They assured me it would be taken care of. I think that started the emotional roller coaster this week. I want things to be right and I have been desiring that my life be spelled out for me. What does life hold for me? In many ways my very identity has changed and I am coming to grips with new areas in my life. Thanks for letting me be so transparent but I know that you faithful readers of this blog will pray for me and for God to lead me into His purposes for my life.

I love you all so much, even those of you I do not know. Thanks for taking of your time to keep up with me.

Robin

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Robin,
Thanks for sharing with us. I cannot imagine what you go through at times. Even though we know where George is spending eternity it doesn't always make it easy my friend. Watching Brian practice baseball gives me a new prespective of life. I know truly that he must miss having his dad at the field with him cheering him on. Girl, Paul and I are encouraging him along the way. He did great yesterday and he was so proud of himself when he hit the ball over the fence. It is a blessing to him on the team. Know that I am praying for you and trusting aht the Lord will truly guide your every step. Love you Gayle

Lesley said...

Robin,

I watched my mom go through a very similar experience, and it is heartbreaking. You are human, and you will, unfortunately, have rough days. That is when your faith will sustain you. You are never alone. Our God is always with you, and when the load gets too heavy... He will carry it for you. You and the kids are still in my prayers.

Lesley :-)

Anonymous said...

Robin,
Whether you realize it or not, you are truly an inspiration to me. I am continuing to lift you up in prayer my friend. My prayer for you today is that the Lord would lavish His love on you! I miss you and love you dearly!

Michelle

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your "realness",Robin. It lets us know more how to pray. You are a blessing to many...
love you,friend...
Cathy

Carole Turner said...

I pray for you all daily. Love you! Carole

Sonja said...

Robin,
Human words seem so insignificant at a time like this. I know it helps but OH how sweet are the super natural words of the Lord and His super natural arms wrapped around you! His work is hidden at times and although you can not see it right now...I know He is indeed carrying you through all this!
I think the main thing George would be upset about is that it made you upset to see his grave site so unpolished! His heart I am sure acked for you...but the grave we "can not see" but "know exsist" is far more beautiful...
I will pray that George's absent will allow the Lord's presence to increase all the more! I loved Pastors message in that He is always with you!!!!!
If you need anything, I am here!

Sonja H.