oops.....

Sorry that I have neglected writing. It seems as though I am burning the proverbial candle at both ends. I have not remembered a time when I have been quite as busy as the last couple of weeks. Trying to get our graduation invitations, clean house, teach school, tutor, go to Bryan's games, play on my own softball team, etc. WOW!!!! I know in a couple of weeks it will all slow down and I can truly say I can't wait. Lauren is winding school down and she is very excited. We have much to do between now and then but we have agreed to take it one day at a time. The Lord continues to show Himself faithful. As we hold on to Him and the truth of His word He sees us through on a daily basis. I am learning so much about waiting on Him. Now your going to have to wait on me to get the chance to finsh the latest thought. Signing out RW

emotions pt.2...

We can find comfort in the fact that God is an emotional being. He made us in His image and emotions are part of who He is. The bible says that God has felt love, anger, regret, joy. At one point He even regretted the fact that He created man. WOW that must have been an intense emotion. Since we want to make sure as Christians we are not led by our emotions, we sometimes let the pendulum swing to the other extreme and attempt to feel no emotions. God does desire us to feel things if not we would be beings void of emotion. Our emotions compel us into relationships, both platonic and romantic. Our emotions let us connect on a different level with people in our lives. The whole point of this involvement is to affect eternity. Christ was compelled by love. As He looked over Israel and saw them as sheep without a shepherd He was greatly moved. It was that emotion that compelled Him to lay down His life and endure death on a cross. Obedience is awesome, but I think humans have a hard time obeying for the sake of obeying. Once we feel that we are unconditionally loved by God, and that He truly has our best interest at heart, then obeying is a result of that LOVING relationship. Ask the Lord to make real to you the depth, width, height, and length of His incomparable LOVE. Don't be afraid to FEEL, just don't be consumed by your feelings. As I said the other day, let your emotions be submitted to the Lordship of Christ. There is such great victory in Christ and in every area of our lives He desires to be involved. Involve HIM. See what happens!!!!!! Love to you all, RW

emotions....

The Lord has been teaching me a lot lately about emotions. You certainly can't trust them. The only sure thing in our lives is God and His incredibly awesome word. The Bible says heaven and earth will pass away but His word WILL REMAIN. That is our promise from God about the strength and lasting power of His word. Our emotions, which originate in the soulish realm, bring with them the potential for great deception. Our emotions have to be submitted to the Father and we must allow Him to redeem them . They must be subjected to the authority of God's word and if they don't fall in line with His word, they are attempting to deceive us. If our emotions come about because of selfish motives or our desire to protect ourselves we must check our emotions and then submit our heart to God to help us guard it. That is why so many of us build walls of protection, because we find ourselves operating out of emotions and determine that our heart (feelings) won't be hurt that way again. I offer that when we take those disappointments to the Lord and allow His word to recenter us, we can then realize that God will protect our hearts and the WALL is unnecessary. Saints, I urge you to allow the Lord by the power of His Holy Spirit to tear down protective walls that you may have erected for protection. Then allow Him to cover, shelter and protect you. He does a much better job and the results produce life not an inward focus and resolve to never go there again. We must do this in order to prevent our heart from becoming hardened. The soil of our heart has to be soft and ready to receive the seed of God's word. That is the only way the Word will then bring forth the fruit we so earnestly desire. More later. RW

My answer....

After getting alone with God this was the answer He gave me in regard to the gift of faith He gave me and the body at Hosanna. " You did have the faith to believe and I wanted you to sense it so that you would understand that when I made the choice not to answer the way you believed you would eventually come to understand, that the purpose for George's death was greater than the power of your faith to believe him to be healed or even raised from the dead."

I had to then realize that God wanted to make the point to me and the body at Hosanna that even in the midst of an environment that would produce a miracle of resurrection, God's decision to bring George home was more purposed and will produce more power ultimately than the faith we were operating in. WOW That is awe inspiring to me. I then asked God, the next time I sense that level of knowing faith will I actually see the power of that kind of faith. His answer was, "Your faith to believe Me has not been hindered, neither will it falter. When it is time to operate at that same level of faith you will see the power because it will be My purpose. OK God I believe you and I am waiting to see us all operating at that level of faith. We will see the ushering in of the Kingdom of God and the return of Christ our Lord.

Our God is so good and He will reward those who diligently seek Him. Press in saints. RW

sorry...

I'm sorry I have not posted my journal yet. I have not been home one night this week, my washer has gone out, and you know just one of those weeks. It's ok however remember the last post was to rejoice it's a choice. I have begun doing a Beth Moore bible study on believing God. Oh my, the timing of this study is perfect and I have only been to two meetings but it has been so powerful. Tonight, I will try to type the answer God gave me. I want desperately to share it with you all. I love you.
RW

let it out....

Well what a weekend. I found myself in a very emotional state Sunday after church. The kids had to stay at church for something so I was alone. I went to the cemetery and sat and thought and talked out loud. I called a friend of mine to pray for me and as he spoke he challenged me to let go of my anger. My response was that I wasn't angry, but even as I said it I knew I was even trying to hide it from myself. He continued to explain that I could be angry at God's decision and still love God. He asked, "Have you ever been angry at your kids. Yeah, but you still love them, right?" Yes, IT finally started surfacing and I realized that I needed to get alone with God and let it out. So when I arrived home to my room I went willing to lay it all out before God. He already knew what I was feeling anyway, He was just waiting for me to actually acknowledge it to myself and Him. What surfaced was the anger I felt toward the Lord for giving me a true GIFT of faith to believe for George's healing but He did not heal him. Why God? Why the gift to believe if Your plan was to take him home? WOW what a cleansing process I had with the Lord. God spoke to me very specifically and I will type it later. I am at school and I don't have my journal with me. I do want to share with you all how precious the Lord answered that question. Our God is a great God and He will intimately see us through our situations, send people into our lives to challenge us, and He will meet us right where we are. His main concern is our relationship with Him and the Kingdom. More later. RW

wow graduation is on the way...

I can't believe this, but graduation is coming like a freight train. Lauren is soon going to be going on to another phase of life. That thought gives me a reality check. As much as we may try, we cannot slow down life. All we can do is purpose in our hearts to make awesome memories with the ones we love. Enjoy the days we are given and make the best of all trials and triumphs. Allow those things to make us the people that God wants us to become. The Lord has laid down the challenge to us all to rejoice in all of our situations. The good, the bad, and the absolutely mundane still require our rejoicing. And guess what, it is all worth our rejoicing. When things are good, rejoice because they are good and enjoyable. When things are bad, rejoice because God is purposing to add something to your character and He is building hope in you. When things are mundane, rejoice because in the simplicity of life we learn that God is still with us and will never leave us or forsake us. Washing clothes, cooking supper, changing the oil, etc. doesn't mean that we are out of the presence of God. Freedom comes in the realization that those activities are actually times to purpose to be in prayer because they are usually mindless activities that don't require much thinking anyway. I love you all and am again so thankful for your goodness to me and mine. Rejoice, it is a choice. RW