reminded...

I have spent time this week working on getting this blog ready to be published. I have started writting the Forward and thought about how the book is to be formatted. I know that the book will end with the writing I found about George calling forth his destiny. I thought I would repost it for you all to read again. Here it is

This was something George wrote on Monday March 3, 1997:

I have a destiny---that is farther reaching than my own self. I have a destiny that goes beyond my own greed, my own lust, my own wants and my own desires, my own passions. I have a destiny-- that's bigger than racism and bigotry and hate. It is bigger than pride and position, possession, and income and all of those physical and social trappings, we cling to so desperately. Hang on, oh my soul to the one who guides you, the one who made you, to the one who called you. I have a destiny that is not bound by political rule and governmental boundaries or corporate ownership. Even health--good or bad--cannot prevent my destiny. I want my destiny, I need my destiny. I crave my destiny. I have to fulfill my destiny! It is calling to me--I am racing to my destiny--I can see it dimly in the dawn--my heart pounds, my body struggles, my muscles burn and ask for rest-- but I cannot stop nor even slow down, for I must apprehend my destiny. As thirst screams for quenching--my very being thirsts for my destiny--fatigue cannot stop or dissuade me from my destiny. Depression? move to the left, anxiety? move to the right, for my destiny I have in sight. I command inspiration to come and lift me toward my goal. I command passion to come and fuel the long drive towards my destiny. I command persistence to come and assist me in the pursuit of my destiny. I come against any bondage that would prevent the attainment of my destiny--any of the "petty" frivolities that would entangle and hamper the attainment of my most ultimate desire. As minutes turn into hours and hours into days, weeks, months, and years, I seek my destiny. I will not be relegated to the archives of history. Futility, I damn you ---you are a facade. HA!HA! You are uncovered for what you really are! Nothing! Nothing but a deceptive mirage of sorts put in my path by who knows who, to distract me from my destiny. Yes, my love, I will one day embrace you as a child its mother, I am coming for you and no other only you, oh lover of my soul. I hear your whispers in the night, your call in my soul. I see a glimpse of you in the dawn-but only from within the cleft of this rock--when can I come out and gaze fully into your face? Ah yes. I know I must be patient, but please, don't ever let me go, for life itself has no meaning at all, apart from YOU-- may I dream of you every night, and every day let me keep you within my sight. Above and beyond every single thing in life, I must attain my destiny and nothing can stop me, for it is MY DESTINY.

Enough said,
Robin

one year....

As we have come to the one year anniversary of George's homegoing I am quickly reminded of God's faithfulness. It has been a year of much emotion as we have gone through birthdays, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Christmas, anniversaries, Lauren's graduation, the birth of our great niece, so many things have happened in this year. In the midst of these events, I have not only experienced the absence of George in our lives but I have also experienced that he would have wanted us rejoicing and not mourning. I have mentioned to many people that lately I have missed the energy that Goerge brought to every situation. I miss the intensity that George brought into a room. I think in the aftermath of the hurricane I really missed what I know he would have been doing. Getting the yard clean at any cost and helping so many others in need. That was George and that was what drove him. So as we remember George, let's think about what he would desire for us. What would he want us to experience in this life, even in his absence. He has experienced the greatest promotion this life has to offer. George is in that great cloud of witnesses cheering us on from the other side. Do you hear him, goodness knows he was loud enough, remember the richness of his voice and the excitement in his laughter. He is hooping and hollering, I can hear him.

His parents, Lauren and Bryan, my brother and his family all went to the cemetary Sunday. It was a time of rememberance for us all. I want to always be in a mode of celebrating George's life and the fact that he loved people with all of his heart. He always saw the best in people, even those difficult to love. George would find a way to love people. I am constantly reminded of his generosity, and heart to want all to feel the love of God.

RW

weathered the storm...

Well Gustav has come and gone but many are still feeling his affects. We have two big oak trees down. Thank God they did not fall on anything. We were without power for three days. We are so blessed because many are still without power and maybe without for weeks. A friend of mine, Scott, and I were talking about the spiritual hurricanes that blow through our lives and blow out a lot of debris. Then it is time for cleanup and new life to emerge. We need to take stock of what God wants us to clean out of our lives. What does the wind of His spirit want to blow out of our lives. What does He desire to change in our lives? I have gotten to the place of surrender again and again where I ask God to continue to have His way in me. If any one needs anything please let us know and I will see if I can get you some help. I love you all and thanks for keeping up with us. RW

hard to believe....

Yes, go ahead and let it be known, Robin has a daughter who is an LSU college student. I refuse to believe that I am old enough to have a child in college. How can it seem as though you just left campus and truly that was 20 years ago. Twenty years, you've got to be kiddin' me. Where has the time gone. I guess that is what happens while we are living life, ----time is passing. I think that is why the Bible tells us to redeem our time because the days are evil. I think part of redeeming our time is acknowledging that, like it or not it is continuing to pass and it will stop for no man. My gray hair is evidence of that.

God continues to amaze me with how He will give us divine appointments if we will keep our eyes open for them. I was in a furniture store with a friend of mine this weekend, and ended up in a conversation with the sales lady about George and the faith journey we have been on. It was awesome watching God come on the scene. She then expressed how she would have loved to have known George and how blessed she was that we came in the store yesterday. WOW God just do what you want to do. She gave us her cell phone and email address so we could stay in touch with her.

Keep the fire burning and let the trials in our lives prove God as faithful and then tell others about our awesome God and how He will see us through.

RW

God continues to do....

God continues to do what only He can do. As we surrender our lives to Him, He promises to lead and direct our paths. However, we must not lean on our own understanding. As I begin this new phase of life, I look forward with great anticipation to what God has in store. As we step out and seek to obey Him, He meets us and gives us light for the next step.

Lauren is officially employed now at Target. She is so excited and will be starting college (LSU) on the 25th. I have a daughter in college. There is nothing ok about that. Where has the time gone. I think I blinked and someone sped the time forward on me.

For those of you that read this blog and go to Hosanna, I want to encourage all of us to get on board with the vision Pastor has for us. We need to all dare to believe God and expect Him to refresh and revive us and speak this to those around us. Life is not about work, school, church and repeating that week after week. Life is about searching for the eternal purpose for the lives we come across on a daily basis. Life is about seeking the Lord and the way He would have us conduct ourselves in the midst of the circumstances we find ourselves in. Press into the things of the Lord and expect Him to answer and show the way. Love ya, RW

faith, hope, and love...

I watched the video of George the other night. He set up the camera and for over 40 minutes he read different scriptures to us. He skipped around the Bible reading out loud. It was great seeing him on the video. Much of what he read had to do with faith and love. The Lord began ministering to me as George was reading. If we settle the issues of faith and love hope will take care of itself. As we live expecting God to honor His word and being faithful to what He has promised and loving those around us then we will live with hope in our lives.

Lauren has gone with Becca, a friend of hers, to move her into her dorm in Cleveland, TN. She will be coming home with Becca's mom on Sunday. She is growing up and it is different working through the releasing her to go and do things without me. It's all part of the process and the passage of time.

I encourage you all to keep your heart open to God. There is constantly things He is trying to teach us. Our hearts need to be pliable in His hands. We need to be quick to obey and the Lord leads us. more later, RW

school started.....,

Well today was the first day of school for Bryan. It was his first day of school in his life that didn't include Lauren and I being there. Real different for me to drop him off and not stick around. God has faithfully shown me some things about myself. It is not always nice seeing things about yourself that God wants to change. He wants to change my way of thinking and looking a things, people and situations. I have seemed to allow myself to be distracted in a couple of areas getting my mind and heart off of HIS purposes and set on my own. However, God in His gentle way can get our attention and redirect and focus us on what is ultimately important. It never fails when we get ourselves on our minds too much God has to get our attention and let us know it is NOT about us.

Today I have officially started the process of making this blog into a book. Please pray for God's direction and that I will have the mind of Christ in all that I do. I want to know what He wants.

I have had to surrender, resurrender, and surrender again. RW

pics..

Here are a couple of pics of Lauren and I, one from prom the other from graduation. I am finally learning how to post pictures. We have been pretty busy trying to get ourselves ready for the new school year. Lauren and Bryan along with Nana's assitance have been rearranging their rooms. So the house is upside down but it will soon be coming together.

I am finding myself in constan surrender mode. Surrendering plans, surrendering emotions, surrendering it all. The process of dying to self is not easy, but quite necessary. I will start working on publishing the blog Monday. Compiling it all together and writing a synopsis of what was happening along the way. I can't wait to get going with this because I feel it is the calling to the Lord to get this done. I go into this next phase of life with mych anticipation of what God wants to do IN and through me.

Oh, while mom was cleaning out a drawer for Lauren to have the chest of drawers she found a video tape left behind by George. It was in the back of his underwear drawer, labeled GEORGE--HIMSELF 1/26/06. I have not watched it yet but will watch tonight. I am sure he will start by saying, "You have just now cleaned out my underwear drawer!!" Can't wait to hear from him. Lately, I have been missing him in a new way. Missing his insightful comments, missing his humor, missing his wisdom, missing the decisions he would be making.

More after church tomorrow, RW

school soon to start...

Well we bought Bryan school uniforms the other day. Trying to get ready for the new school year. Lauren is steady preparing for LSU. I have been helping a friend of mine out at his business four or five hours a day. He owns a printing company and it has been interesting learning how that business works.

You know the Lord is ever wanting to teach us things. I have begun learning more and more about the love of Christ. I Corinthians 13 is such a wonderful passage. I want a more in depth understanding of this love. I want to see myself operating in this love in all of my relationships. As we read this passage we realize how sacrificial this love truly is. It holds no record of wrong, it does not seek its own, it is patient and kind. WOW!!!! Jesus must love like this through us because we are totally incapable of such love. As pastor Ralph preached Wednesday we need to clean our loves out of the dust that collects so that times of refreshing my come. We get so bogged down in the act of living that we forget about the most precious thing around us---people. Lord open our eyes to those around us. Those that are in need of an encouraging word, a smile of peace and joy. Let us realize that if we stay consumed with ourselves we miss opportunities to exhibit the love of God. more later RW

Go God....

Yesterday was an awesome church service. The Lord is letting us know that He desires to be manifest before us. He desires for us to believe Him and hold nothing back. Corporately, He is wanting us to be convinced that in this life there is nothing else that matters but the Kingdom of God. Hosanna, we are on the brink of seeing a move of the Spirit like never before. Press in, don't lose heart, believe, take all the limits off of God. This needs to be our testimony, not only when we are speaking to each other, but while we are out doing our daily things. God is among men desiring to make Himself known. He is desiring to pour out His Spirit on all flesh, so let's dare to believe that this is true. Let's dare to step out and pray with those we come across in our daily lives and watch God move and people see the out stretched hand of God ministering through us. Lord we move through our daily lives with great anticipation of what you want to do in and through us. Make us sensitive to your voice and the move of your Spirit. We submit ourselves to you dying to our own expectations and desires and allowing Your expectations and desires to be made manifest in our lives. Lord move mightily through us as we believe you and put ACTION to our FAITH. RW

colorado

This is a pic of Lauren close to the Continental Divide. You can see tire tracks in the snow behind us that is where Randy got the 4-wheel drive Bronco stuck. Fortunately, 24 ATV riders showed up and helped push him out. It took us 3 hours to drive 13 miles but oh it was a lot of fun.

God is great-God is good

Oh my word if we only understood what we are on the verge of church we would be on our faces. God so desires to manifest His presence in our midst and some seem to be content with things as usual. It is not time for things as usual, it is time to take the gloves off and get down to some spiritual warfare. Our weapons are not carnal but are mighty to the pulling down of strongholds and we must activate those weapons in these end times or we will merely watch the events from a distance. Oh Lord I do not want to watch from a distance I want to be in the heat of the battle seeing you do great and mighty things in and through me. Church let the cry of your heart be come Lord Jesus come. Do in us and through us that which will advance the kingdom. It is time to mobilize. For months the words in my heart from the Lord are, " DO WHAT YOU KNOW TO DO." We keep looking for greater revelation, and more words and God is asking us to get busy doing what He has already entrusted to our care. Let's not be like those who did nothing with their talents and just waited on their lords return, but let's be those working when He returns. Seeking Him is part of that work. Believing Him is part of that work. Extending the love of Jesus is part of that work. Be diligent to be on the cutting edge of what the Spirit is crying out to the BODY.

I love you all. RW

back home....

The kids and I are back home after two glorious weeks in Colorado. There are simply no words that can express the beauty and majesty of the mountains in Colorado. I actually stood on top of the Continental Divide and looked 360 degrees and saw the most awesome snow capped mountains. There was such a sense of God's awesomeness in my heart as I looked over His creation. I stood spellbound knowing that what I was seeing doesn't even compare with the experience George is having in heaven. Seeing Jesus face to face, being able to understand the spirit realm, knowing and talking with the saints of old. What an incredible thought.

God is doing so much in my life. Sometimes I feel as though I am on a launching pad and the preparation is taking place but I have no idea where I am headed. As the summer comes quickly to a close I will soon begin the undertaking of publishing the blog, and finishing the other book George had started. Please pray that I stay very sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit. I don't want to miss even one whispher the Father is speaking. God is desiring to move in our midst in ways that we have only read about in the book of Acts and books written long ago about great revivals. It is time for the church to dare to actually believe what we read. I think as we stepped out and trusted God for George's healing and even his ressurection it was the first step in our coming to the place of anticipation of what God is wanting to do in and through us. God not answering that prayer has nothing to do with His inability or our lack of faith. Rememeber as the Lord laid on my heart that His reason for not moving in the midst of such great faith is because the greater purpose for the kingdom will be fulfilled through George's death. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that George showed us all how to live graciously and to die with faith trusting and believing God no matter what. I also believe that now that he is with Jesus we must purpose to let the Lord have His way in each of us. Let the power of the Holy Spirit move on our hearts and change us. We need each to purpose to ask God to demonstrate His love, agape love through us. Yes we need to reach out to the unlovable and the sinner, but we must also love our spouses with agape love, love our brothers and sisters in the Lord with agape love, and realize that agape love is sacrificial it does not ever seek its own. It is not about protecting itself, it is about giving and giving even when nothing is returned.

I love each of you. Thanks for keeping up with us and taking the time to read my thoughts. RW

faith and feelings....

Isn't it interesting that sometimes we sense so obviously the presence of the Lord in our lives. It seems as though everything we hear, everything we read, and those we talk to is the leading of the Lord. Then without notice it seems as though the heavens are brass and the Lord is a million miles away. I was talking with a friend about this. It seems as though the Lord wants to make sure we do not depend on what we feel. We must depend on the truth of the Word. We must stake our very lives on what we know to be true. I will never leave you or forsake you. He that is in you is greater than he that is in the world. I will always lead you into triumph.

These are truths that we need to know and believe. We must know the word, believe the word and use the word. In order for us to constantly know that the Lord is at work in our lives we must USE the word. We may not feel anything but we can still be convinced because God's word does what it is sent to do. God is so good to us. Believe, believe. RW

July 9th

Yesterday was George's birthday. A day of much reflection and missing him. Another milestone in the year of first that must be endured. We spent the day with family and of course that helped, as well as trusting the Lord to see us through. He is faithful and we talked about many George memories and moments. If any of you want to check out a tribute to George you can go to www.mem.com and type in his name and see some pics and stuff. I want to add more to that page later.

I am seeking the Lord for more direction as I start working on the books that I want to get published. Not going back to teaching this year is going to be different but I know that God is in it. I am just trusting Him to show me each step of the way. Lauren is registered at LSU and Bryan will be starting school August 11. It is a time of new beginnings and that is what the Lord has been ministering to me. Isaiah 43 & 44 are the scriptures I have been pondering and I continue to hang on to what God has in store for me and the kids. Please continue to pray for me that I would be sensitive to what the Lord is wanting me to do. I love you all and thank you for your prayers. RW

enjoying summer

We have really been enjoying our summer. Last week we went to orientation at LSU and Lauren officially has her schedule and is ready to go. She will be looking for a job and settling to her new life as an LSU Tiger. I am just a little excited since I am an alumni. While we were on campus I was telling Lauren how surreal it was knowing that I had walked those halls and sat in many of those classrooms some twenty years before her. I am so thrilled that she is pressing in to what God has for her.

Bryan will be back at Hosanna and starting the 8th grade. I can't believe that he will be finishing up junior high this school year. He is as tall as I am and growing everyday.

God is of course on the move. We as the body of Christ are in store for much of God's presence but we must press in to Him. He wants to be looked for, searched out, and known. Wednesday night at church was absolutely incredible. We had a guest speaker, a pastor from India. It was such an anointed service and God moved on many hearts. There is NOTHING that satisfies like the awesome presence of God. I mean the presence where you can basically feel Him in the room. The Lord has continued to deal with me about obedience and dying to self. I thinks we never arrive in either of these areas it is a constant learning and growing.

Be blessed my friends and know that I love you all. RW

leaning...

Today at a party I was talking to Greg and Craig and we were talking about leaning not to our own understanding. As we were talking it became so apparent that, that is one of the keys to victory. We cannot afford to try to figure out situations in our own understanding. God alone knows why He allows things in our lives that do not make sense. I mean why do we have to have people die young in our lives, why do accidents happen, why do our children turn their backs on what they know is the truth. All of these situations make no sense in the natural. However, in the spirit there may be many reasons. We have a real enemy that is after bringing us to a place of doubt and unbelief. He (the enemy) is trying to make our walks (lives) totally ineffective for the kingdom. The Lord allows these difficulties because He is attempting to create something in us that will last for eternity, and here in the temporal existence is where we learn it. WOW!!!! You mean this is a training ground. I say yes. He says we will rule and reign with Him. There must be things that we are to learn here that we may use in eternity. Our understanding must be deceptive if we are instructed not to lean on it. It is very tempting to look to the natural for answers, but God said there are no true answers in the natural realm. The truth about situations, people, and handling life's adventures must be found in the Spirit. Victory in situations does not come about by our own logic and figuring. The things of the Spirit seem to run contrary to the world's logic. Things in the visible try to mock the unseen. FAITH is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things NOT SEEN. Our Lord reigns in the unseen realm. He is Lord of ALL visible and invisible. We must lift our eyes and ask the Lord to help us see with spiritual eyes.

Lord only you can give us clear vision of that which we can't see. Only you can give us wisdom and understanding of that which is out of our grasp to understand. And oh Lord when you shine light and give revelation there is nothing in this world as sweet as knowing that you are speaking to us. RW

Florida....

We just got back from a trip to Pensacola. We had a great time just relaxing and having nothing planned. The weather was great and Bryan definitely got some sun.

The last couple of weeks has been a time of much reflection. Father's Day was a difficult day but the body of Christ at Hosanna stepped up as usual and ministered great love to me and Lauren and Bryan. Russell, Margie, Pat and Charlotte, Rhonda, and Eileen you will never know what it meant to me to have you surrounding us in prayer. There is nothing that can take the place of the church reaching out to those within. Thank you. After church we went to River Ridge and spent time with Granny Patsy, Paw-Paw Mike, Mike, Eva and Carey. It was emotional but oh sooo good to be with family. I love them all so much and they have such a special place in my heart.

God is continuing to make me so aware of His ability to shelter, comfort and protect me. I love you all.

RW

Praise Him....

Pastor Don has been sharing lately about God equipping us with the weapon of praise. That is what we need to do, praise Him in the midst of our circumstances. In so doing we claim to God and every demon in ear shot, that no matter what the circumstances our GOD is GOD. We claim that He is bigger than our situation and that He alone can see us through. Also praise changes our perspective it allows us to remind ourselves who God is even when circumstances are trying to gain our full attention. I think the biggest thief of our praise is ingratitude. When we begin complaining, we are stating through our complaint that God is not able to handle our situation. We are stating that HIS ways are not the right ways. We may find ourselves in the midst of difficult situations for many reasons. Maybe we are in these situations because of choices on our own part or maybe God has allowed the trying of our faith, regardless we must purpose to allow life to work in us what God intends to be worked in us.

If we will cooperate with the Holy Spirit we will learn deep truths in the midst of great heartache and trials. Learning that praise must go forth no matter the circumstances, places us above the situation and able to see with God's perspective. We need God's vantage point. We need to see as He sees, we need the mind of Christ. So praise Him and watch yourself change in the midst of adversity. Praise Him and see God the way He needs to be seen in relation to this temporary life. Praise Him for He is eternal, unmovable, unshakable----HE is GOD. RW

thanks for your patience....

Wow! It has been quite a while since my last post. So sorry to you all who faithfully check in to see what is going on. Well school is out for the summer and we are enjoying a little down time.

God continues to show Himself faithful and we are pressing in to knowing Him more and learning His ways in the midst of this life He has given us to live. I am convinced more and more that we are not our own and that because we have been bought with a price we really have no authority to call the shots. God calls the shots and He alone knows what is best for us and the Kingdom of God. God has continued to show me more and more depths of His love. It is awe inspiring to catch a glimpse of that love. We see it daily when we consider the cross but I think we forget to realize that it was love, not obligation that compelled Christ to the cross. Christ would have endured anything in order for our relationship with Him to be restored. That is what it is all about our relationship with Him. The Father said, "This is your bride." And Christ immediately fell in love with us. "However Jesus there is only one hitch. In order for you to have the relationship you desire with her you will have to take on flesh, live out a sinless life on earth, then if that is not enough you will be falsely accused and endure the punishment of a criminal--death on a cross. But once you do that you will be able to experience the ultimate in realtionships with your bride. Are you willing?" Christ response, "Am I willing, look at her isn't she the most beautiful thing you have ever seen. Of course I am willing. Knowing that after all of that I can have HER, I will do whatever it takes. I want that relationship." The Father then says, "Go buy back your Bride."

That love is hard for many of us to understand because we are so self-seeking and looking out for number one. We want to know what a relationship will gain us. We want to know that if we invest time and emotion we are going to get something back. However, that is the glory of agape love---it does not seek its own. It loves because the thought of not loving is more painful than the thought of not being loved back. Agape love truly has to give because there is more fulfillment in the loving than being loved. Christ has brought this love alive to me. This is so new to me but I am daily experiencing the love of Christ.

More on this later, I love you all. RW

graduated....

On Friday, May 16th Lauren graduated from Hosanna Christian Academy with honors. She has accomplished much in her high school career. She has played basketball and volleyball, been a class officer, and ministered on the school's worship team. Lauren is a blessing to our family and I love her very much. When I used to talk about having teenagers people would always say poor you to which I would say, "No you don't know my daughter. She is a joy, and she makes life easy." Excuse me while I brag on her a little.

School will be out at the end of this week. Oh I am counting down the days. This has been a year to say the least. I am looking forward to a little down time with the kids. Thanks to all of you who have encouraged us along the way. Thanks for your encouraging comments left on the blog, thanks for your notes, and just your love shown in all different ways. God is our strength, an ever present help in time of trouble. Love, RW

New York.....

Lauren is in New York on Senior Trip. She has seen a lot, been to a Broadway play, walked through Central Park and this morning they were on the Today Show. We have been watching American Idol and she and I both love Jason Castro. Well last week he was voted off the show and this morning he was on the Today Show. Well she got to take a picture with him. How cool is that? I can't wait to hear all of the stories she and her friends are going to have to tell.

Graduation is Friday night with a party on Saturday night and a family get together on Sunday. It will be an awfully busy weekend but one of much excitement. Carey, my nephew, is also graduating from Brother Martin. His graduation is the week after Lauren's so at least there are not too many scheduling conflicts. The beginning of this month has been very emotional. Bryan's birthday, my birthday, Mother's day, senior chapel and graduation coming has screamed at all of us about George's absence. We purpose in our hearts to enjoy this time because it is a time of celebration and we know that is the way George would expect it to be. Our year of firsts without George also includes some other monumental life moments like Bryan turning 13, Lauren and Carey graduating, and the birth of Michael's, our nephews, first child. God is so very gracious in these moments and His comfort is tangible at times. More later, RW

another birthday....

Yes today is my birthday. Not ashamed to say that I have made 43 years. Hard to believe since I don't feel 43. But nothing changes the facts. I am 43. It has been a glorious day. It started out early with my kids wishing me a happy birthday, then I went to my car and some friends had left me flowers, muffins and fresh fruit. I began the morning with tears in my eyes, feeling so full of blessings. The Lord is beyond good to us and the work He has done in me is miraculous. I will share soon some of the depths of the work that has been going on in my heart. You all are incredible friends whom I love dearly. I wish I could get with each of you and spend some quality time. Have an awesome day and as George would say, "Go to church and worship God." I love you all. RW

birthday

Yesterday was Bryan's 13th birthday. I cannot believe he is already 13. It was a great day but a busy day. George's mom and dad came in and took Bryan out to eat and Lauren and I attended the Athletic Banquet. Lauren received an awesome award. I am so proud of her. She was awarded the Christian Athletic Leadership Award. What an honor!

The last couple of days an awareness of George's absence has been strong. I guess with Bryan turning 13 it is just one of those first year milestones that have to be experienced. The men from church are coming to help finish some work on the deck and help with some things around the house. What an awesome body I am a part of. I love the people of Hosanna. They exhibit the love of God in such practical ways and I have come to see what it is to be loved unconditionally.

The school year is winding down and the summer will be full of vacationing, relaxing and seeking God. Can't wait to be in that place. Looking forward to the leadership of the Lord. More to come. RW

oops.....

Sorry that I have neglected writing. It seems as though I am burning the proverbial candle at both ends. I have not remembered a time when I have been quite as busy as the last couple of weeks. Trying to get our graduation invitations, clean house, teach school, tutor, go to Bryan's games, play on my own softball team, etc. WOW!!!! I know in a couple of weeks it will all slow down and I can truly say I can't wait. Lauren is winding school down and she is very excited. We have much to do between now and then but we have agreed to take it one day at a time. The Lord continues to show Himself faithful. As we hold on to Him and the truth of His word He sees us through on a daily basis. I am learning so much about waiting on Him. Now your going to have to wait on me to get the chance to finsh the latest thought. Signing out RW

emotions pt.2...

We can find comfort in the fact that God is an emotional being. He made us in His image and emotions are part of who He is. The bible says that God has felt love, anger, regret, joy. At one point He even regretted the fact that He created man. WOW that must have been an intense emotion. Since we want to make sure as Christians we are not led by our emotions, we sometimes let the pendulum swing to the other extreme and attempt to feel no emotions. God does desire us to feel things if not we would be beings void of emotion. Our emotions compel us into relationships, both platonic and romantic. Our emotions let us connect on a different level with people in our lives. The whole point of this involvement is to affect eternity. Christ was compelled by love. As He looked over Israel and saw them as sheep without a shepherd He was greatly moved. It was that emotion that compelled Him to lay down His life and endure death on a cross. Obedience is awesome, but I think humans have a hard time obeying for the sake of obeying. Once we feel that we are unconditionally loved by God, and that He truly has our best interest at heart, then obeying is a result of that LOVING relationship. Ask the Lord to make real to you the depth, width, height, and length of His incomparable LOVE. Don't be afraid to FEEL, just don't be consumed by your feelings. As I said the other day, let your emotions be submitted to the Lordship of Christ. There is such great victory in Christ and in every area of our lives He desires to be involved. Involve HIM. See what happens!!!!!! Love to you all, RW

emotions....

The Lord has been teaching me a lot lately about emotions. You certainly can't trust them. The only sure thing in our lives is God and His incredibly awesome word. The Bible says heaven and earth will pass away but His word WILL REMAIN. That is our promise from God about the strength and lasting power of His word. Our emotions, which originate in the soulish realm, bring with them the potential for great deception. Our emotions have to be submitted to the Father and we must allow Him to redeem them . They must be subjected to the authority of God's word and if they don't fall in line with His word, they are attempting to deceive us. If our emotions come about because of selfish motives or our desire to protect ourselves we must check our emotions and then submit our heart to God to help us guard it. That is why so many of us build walls of protection, because we find ourselves operating out of emotions and determine that our heart (feelings) won't be hurt that way again. I offer that when we take those disappointments to the Lord and allow His word to recenter us, we can then realize that God will protect our hearts and the WALL is unnecessary. Saints, I urge you to allow the Lord by the power of His Holy Spirit to tear down protective walls that you may have erected for protection. Then allow Him to cover, shelter and protect you. He does a much better job and the results produce life not an inward focus and resolve to never go there again. We must do this in order to prevent our heart from becoming hardened. The soil of our heart has to be soft and ready to receive the seed of God's word. That is the only way the Word will then bring forth the fruit we so earnestly desire. More later. RW

My answer....

After getting alone with God this was the answer He gave me in regard to the gift of faith He gave me and the body at Hosanna. " You did have the faith to believe and I wanted you to sense it so that you would understand that when I made the choice not to answer the way you believed you would eventually come to understand, that the purpose for George's death was greater than the power of your faith to believe him to be healed or even raised from the dead."

I had to then realize that God wanted to make the point to me and the body at Hosanna that even in the midst of an environment that would produce a miracle of resurrection, God's decision to bring George home was more purposed and will produce more power ultimately than the faith we were operating in. WOW That is awe inspiring to me. I then asked God, the next time I sense that level of knowing faith will I actually see the power of that kind of faith. His answer was, "Your faith to believe Me has not been hindered, neither will it falter. When it is time to operate at that same level of faith you will see the power because it will be My purpose. OK God I believe you and I am waiting to see us all operating at that level of faith. We will see the ushering in of the Kingdom of God and the return of Christ our Lord.

Our God is so good and He will reward those who diligently seek Him. Press in saints. RW

sorry...

I'm sorry I have not posted my journal yet. I have not been home one night this week, my washer has gone out, and you know just one of those weeks. It's ok however remember the last post was to rejoice it's a choice. I have begun doing a Beth Moore bible study on believing God. Oh my, the timing of this study is perfect and I have only been to two meetings but it has been so powerful. Tonight, I will try to type the answer God gave me. I want desperately to share it with you all. I love you.
RW

let it out....

Well what a weekend. I found myself in a very emotional state Sunday after church. The kids had to stay at church for something so I was alone. I went to the cemetery and sat and thought and talked out loud. I called a friend of mine to pray for me and as he spoke he challenged me to let go of my anger. My response was that I wasn't angry, but even as I said it I knew I was even trying to hide it from myself. He continued to explain that I could be angry at God's decision and still love God. He asked, "Have you ever been angry at your kids. Yeah, but you still love them, right?" Yes, IT finally started surfacing and I realized that I needed to get alone with God and let it out. So when I arrived home to my room I went willing to lay it all out before God. He already knew what I was feeling anyway, He was just waiting for me to actually acknowledge it to myself and Him. What surfaced was the anger I felt toward the Lord for giving me a true GIFT of faith to believe for George's healing but He did not heal him. Why God? Why the gift to believe if Your plan was to take him home? WOW what a cleansing process I had with the Lord. God spoke to me very specifically and I will type it later. I am at school and I don't have my journal with me. I do want to share with you all how precious the Lord answered that question. Our God is a great God and He will intimately see us through our situations, send people into our lives to challenge us, and He will meet us right where we are. His main concern is our relationship with Him and the Kingdom. More later. RW

wow graduation is on the way...

I can't believe this, but graduation is coming like a freight train. Lauren is soon going to be going on to another phase of life. That thought gives me a reality check. As much as we may try, we cannot slow down life. All we can do is purpose in our hearts to make awesome memories with the ones we love. Enjoy the days we are given and make the best of all trials and triumphs. Allow those things to make us the people that God wants us to become. The Lord has laid down the challenge to us all to rejoice in all of our situations. The good, the bad, and the absolutely mundane still require our rejoicing. And guess what, it is all worth our rejoicing. When things are good, rejoice because they are good and enjoyable. When things are bad, rejoice because God is purposing to add something to your character and He is building hope in you. When things are mundane, rejoice because in the simplicity of life we learn that God is still with us and will never leave us or forsake us. Washing clothes, cooking supper, changing the oil, etc. doesn't mean that we are out of the presence of God. Freedom comes in the realization that those activities are actually times to purpose to be in prayer because they are usually mindless activities that don't require much thinking anyway. I love you all and am again so thankful for your goodness to me and mine. Rejoice, it is a choice. RW

Easter.....

Tomorrow is Easter Sunday. What a glorious day to remember not only our Lord's sacrifice but His triumphant rising from the dead. That is where our victory was won and He brought back the keys to death, hell and the grave. Oh death where is your sting. Our Lord did a work that allows us to live on eternally. George lives on because Jesus redeemed him from the curse of the law. Death has no hold on George. He simply passed from life temporal to life eternal. WOW that is shouting ground. George, we know that you have stepped over to the place we want to be. Looking our master in the face and talking to the prophets of old. What stories you must be hearing. Eternity, we will soon be with you and Jesus; for all of our lives are but a vapor in light of forever.

Let's purpose to set our affections on the Kingdom and advancing it. God wants our lives now and forever. There is no better place to be than in relationship with the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. He does not disappoint. Even in the midst of dispair He is found to be a comfort. His words rock solid and true. Embrace the holy work on the cross, accept His forgiveness which alone can redeem you. Press into knowing Him like you have never known Him before.

Robin

pollen...

UGHHH!!!! The pollen is out in force and so are my sinuses. We have had some beautiful weather but the rain is supposed to be coming in. George's parents came in to visit with us this weekend. We always enjoy their visit. Short school week this week with Easter break on the way. Can't wait for a little time off. Many of you may know but I have decided to take a year off from teaching and work on George's book. I feel that if I don't take the time to do it, it will never get done. I don't want to get years down the road regretting not doing what I feel is very important to do.

The school year is flying by. Graduation will be here soon. Senior trip, senior chapel, graduation all of these events are looming on the horizon. Lauren is driving more and more and becoming more and more independent. She is a very responsible teenager so it is easy to trust that she is o.k. but it is still hard to begin cutting the apron strings. We love you and pray you all have a great Easter. Remember our Risen Lord. He is good to us and His faithfulness endures and so does His love.
Robin

God, coming on strong...

The Lord has been making Himself known to me in a strong way. From reading scriptures, hearing sermons and receiving words of the day, friends writing letters and giving gifts, God is making His presence known to me. I stand in awe of what He is saying. I am in a time of new beginnings, I have known that for a while but God will not let me escape it. At George's funeral my nephew approached me and said, " I know this seems like the end but it is just a new beginning." How sweet but little did he know how profound that statement would be. Last night as I was praying, I asked the Lord to speak to me through His word. I felt led to read Isaiah 43 and 44. WOW From the first verse I began crying because I knew the Lord had led me there. Then in verse 19 I read "See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs forth; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." I began crying even harder because our precious Lord let me know He knows right where I am. The ministering of His Holy Spirit is so intimate. The sense of security, and knowing that my life is in His hands, my future is in His hands. There is no better place to be. George would have it no other way. He would want us living, fulfilling God's purposes for our lives, and advancing the kingdom. It is about eternity. God so desires to be involved in every area of our lives. Not just the things we consider spiritual, He wants all of us. He deserves all of us because He bought us with His precious blood. Lord you have it all. We are yours.

Robin

God is good...

I woke up Tuesday knowing that God was with me and loved me. IT was an awesome sense of His presence in my life. I continue to look to Him to lead me. I feel the waters stirring and God leading. Our Father's promise to never leave us or forsake us is so real. His love and assurance and word are critical in our lives if we are to make it through situations we find ourselves in. God reminded me of the words he gave me to stand on while believing for George's healing. He asked me, "Do you think those words have no relevance to your life now?" At that point I realized that the words the Lord shared with me during those times are words I am still to stand on for my life. God's word is true and we must believe that. However, when destiny and purpose stand with God's word His purposes will always be fulfilled. George fulfilled his purpose, his life was full of destiny and God used Him throughout his life and even through his death to minister hope, love and confidence to people.

I place my hand in the Hand of the Father and know that in this life there will be tribulations, but God is with us. That is real, it is not a bible story or some fairytale. As C.J. said at church Sunday you must reckon for yourself that you TRUST in JESUS. Not just what Jesus can do for you, not knowing about him but knowing that you trust in HIM. Be blessed my friends.
robin

What a week

Emotions have been all over the map this week. I have to realize, I guess, that that is normal. Sometimes I have experienced an overwhelming sense of loneliness, at which time God has come in and shown me His loving kindness. Dealing with issues that George and I would have solved together, or I would have let George decide on his own now fall on my shoulders to deal with. These things sometimes stop me in my tracks because I want to take into consideration what I think George would do.

The cemetery installed the headstone to mark the grave site. I went to see it the other day and the site looks horrible. We have had so much rain that the dirt is washing out around the site and there are holes and weeds growing on the sight. This almost sent me over the edge, knowing how George was about making sure the yard was nice and his love for the soil and all things dirt. I asked the cemetery to please make sure they resolve this issue ASAP. They assured me it would be taken care of. I think that started the emotional roller coaster this week. I want things to be right and I have been desiring that my life be spelled out for me. What does life hold for me? In many ways my very identity has changed and I am coming to grips with new areas in my life. Thanks for letting me be so transparent but I know that you faithful readers of this blog will pray for me and for God to lead me into His purposes for my life.

I love you all so much, even those of you I do not know. Thanks for taking of your time to keep up with me.

Robin

friday

Friday night we had a women's meeting. We watched a DVD on the love of God. I shared after the video and God showed us His incredible LOVE. We as the Bride of Christ need to find that place of confidence in His love for us. We need to respond to God and others and situations in our lives confident in the extravagant love God feels toward us. Once we grasp the truth of the fact that God loves us unconditionally we can then be free to live the lives we are destined to live.

Lauren has been real sick today. She must have had a stomach virus. She has been in bed all day and has just gone more than an hour without throwing up. Please pray for her.

Thank goodness things have slowed down a little for her since basketball season is over. We are all enjoying much more time at home.

The weather today was absolutely gorgeous. I love this time of year. You can actually feel the NEWNESS in the air.

God bless and keep your hearts open to the love of GOD.

robin

church...

I will soon be on my way to church. Just wanted to write since it has been awhile. Thanks for all of you who faithfully keep up with this blog. It is an encouragement to me. I am so excited because Friday we have a women's meeting at church and I will be sharing at the end some of what God has been doing in my life lately. It mostly has to do with God's love. His poured out, lavish, extravagant love.

We are so blessed to be able to call ourselves the Bride of Christ and have Him as our Bridegroom. Lately, I have been meditating on that position being the Bride of Christ. How incredible is that. The Creator of the Universe wants to be in relationship with us. He doesn't just want to save you from an eternity in hell, He wants to be in a RELATIONSHIP with you. He wants to guide you, protect you, love you, speak to you, comfort you. He can do all of these things oh so well. We must learn to be comfortable and confident in this love, not because we deserve it but because it IS the way the Lord feels about us. Why continue to resist it, why not embrace it for all it is!!!! WOW what freedom there is in knowing that God LOVES me, HE really loves me. LISTEN, I NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING. He LOVES you, too. One on one HE loves you. Do you believe it, do you want it, do you think you can experience it. Just ask HIM, He's waiting on YOU.

Robin

happy valentine's day

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!!!!!!!!

Lauren has a game tonight 4 hours away. It is a playoff game for the state. I f we lose the season is over. If they can pull off a win it will be the first girl's basketball playoff victory in the history of HCA. I will update you later about the outcome of the game.

A day of love. Our Lord loves us beyond our ability to understand or adequately respond to it. He has been revealing to me a deep aspect of His love for me. He has brought home to me the idea of being the Bride of Christ. The position of bride is one of privilege and one of honor. We find it hard to embrace that idea because we know the fallen condition we have come from. God longs for relationship with us. His love is so deep it compelled Jesus to go the cross. His love is so wide it covers a multitude of sins. His love is so high we can actually get caught up in it, if we allow ourselves to open our hearts and attempt to understand that, that surpasses knowledge. Today let the Lord love on you. Invite Him to convince you of His love for you. You will then begin to see things in light of that love. The sunset will proclaim His love, the stars in the sky will cry out I love you. Quit trying to justify whether or not you deserve this kind of love, you don't but it is yours anyway. Thank Him for it and rest in it.

Robin

finished...

Tonight is Lauren's last regular season basketball game. They are playing Bethany in Baker. Part of her senior experience is coming to an end. They have secured a spot in the playoffs so she will play at least one more game next week. If they win there will be more. Bryan is getting started with baseball. From one sport to the next. The story of our lives.

I will be getting away for some time with the Lord. I can't wait just to bask in His presence and see what He has to say. I feel as though the Lord has given some direction but I am seeking for clarity on some issues. I can't get away from the Lord dealing with me about living the moment. I have been caught up in trying to figure our the future. What does the future hold? How will God work out ministry opportunities? How will I get the book published? and on and on. I think I can plan without allowing myself to become consumed with the what if's of the future.

Thanks for staying in touch.
Robin

Driver's License...

Well Lauren turned 17 on the 4th. It was fun. She had practice that morning and then we spent 4 hours at the DMV. She has been driving me around town ever since. She is doing a great job. I am working on staying calm and not freaking out that my baby is now driving. Granny and PawPaw came in for a visit and we had some good time. They came to see Lauren's last home game last night. They lost but it was a good game. The girls have secured 2nd place in district so we will be playing in a playoff game at some point.

Our Lord is so gracious and faithful. Continue to put your trust in Him. He wants to shelter you and keep you in the midst of the good times and the bad. Stay close to Him don't wander from His side. Pastor's sermon Sunday was so good about being taught by God. We are constantly being taught if we will take the time to examine our lives and situations and relationships and see what God is doing. Never stay the same always desire change.

Robin

live life now...

I have been encouraged, by a friend to live in the now. WOW!!! What great advice. It reminded me of a sermon pastor preached recently about always looking to the future and missing what God is doing now. What is God doing now? Stop trying to figure out what the future may hold and live the moment. Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus and now. Today holds much promise and the things God has designed for us today will help in forming the future. Isn't it great to know that our Lord and Savior, holds it all in His hands. My comfort comes from knowing the God sees it all and knows the way for me. I don't want to miss sweet opportunities to minister God's love to people because my sights and heart are fixed on the future. Live today and enjoy the moment and seek to realize God's design for you today.

I love each of you and am so thankful for you keeping up with what is going on in our lives. Be blessed.

Robin

God's ways....

Finding the place where we can grasp that God's ways are higher than our ways and his thoughts are higher than our thoughts will give us such freedom. Knowing that our Father works all things together for our good also helps in the acceptance and the embracing of our situation and circumstances. God knows what is best for us and He also knows what is best for the Kingdom. If we seek first the Kingdom, then our hearts are truly concerned about what is best for the Kingdom. Eternity (reality) is what really matters and whatever it takes to advance the Kingdom. Souls are in the balance and eternity is before us.

Lesley thanks for your encouraging comment. Please email me at my personal email (grwaites@bellsouth.net) and remind me of your last name and who you are. Do you still work at the call center?

Be blessed this week and keep your eyes fixed on our Lord.
Robin

great week....

Well it has been a great week. The Waites are blessed. Bryan got a new drum set so he is in the zone learning new beats and waiting for me to set him up with drum lessons. Lauren has a game tonight against Runnels. Hosanna girls are having a great district season. Tonight is a big game and I pray they do their best. God is stirring some things in my life and I am trying to listen and just enjoy the Lord. I know he is leading by His Spirit and I want to be careful to do what he says.

I have had several calls about people's lives that have been touched through the ordeal our family has walked through. I say YEAH!!!! God will ALWAYS take the things in life that seem horrible and work it for a greater good. If we could wrap our minds around that and approach difficult situations from the perspective of realizing that good can come from this then our difficult situation may be bearable.

Lord I pray for those that read this blog that you would move mightily in their lives. If anyone has not turned their lives over to you and trusted you for salvation, I pray that the reality of your sacrifice would be brought to their attention. Lord, Jesus thank you so much for your desire to be active and involved in our lives. There is nothing like walking with you and reading your word and living the exciting life that you have set before us. God keep us mindful of eternity and the things that really matter. We want to know your heart and see things the way you see them. We chose to die to ourselves, our own desires, and plans and surrender to you and your plans. LORD HAVE YOUR WAY. In Jesus name amen.


Robin

long weekend

Well Monday was a much needed day off. We enjoyed hanging out and cleaning house. Of course, Lauren had practice but that was good because they beat Bethany tonight. It was a great win and positions the team in a good place for 2nd place in district. It is still early but tonight was a very important game. Update on the chickens they are still producing 8 to 10 eggs a day. My mom and dad have been the diligent ones left to take care of the chickens. Kenny is in Alabama with George's cousin Sandra and seems to be having the time of his life. We are so excited that he is in a home where he is so loved.

Church Sunday was awesome as usual. God is continuing to send our body a timely word. He is trying to get our attention. Our very lives depend on what He has to say. He who has an ear let him hear.....

I love you all and thank you all for your prayers and your continued support of my family. God uses you daily to minister to me and the kids. We are blessed to have such awesome friends.

Robin

my prayer...

It has come to my attention through many friends that people have found this blog that do not know me and have never met George. It is my prayer and was George's that this blog communicate to you the awesomeness of our GOD. Together George and I along with the incredible body of Christ walked through the valley of the shadow of death. I can truly say one thing for sure, when the Body of Christ operates as it should (and you did and are) there is not only many prayers prayed but there is such a sense of knowing that all is well.

God has continued to show me things and even tonight I wanted to make sure to communicate some things He has recently shown me about death. We as Christians have unfortunately adopted the worlds view of death. Some of us see it as finality, and place where there is much regret and missed opportunities. I tell you the Lord has shown me some different things. Death is the door ALL must walk through, until Jesus comes back and establishes His kingdom. When Jesus bought back the KEYS to death, hell and the grave, and said "O, death where is your sting." HE wasn't stating that because of Him we wouldn't die physically but oh yeah there is now no longer, for the believer the sting of death that keeps you eternally separated from GOD. That is more than good news. We can actually believe that on the other side of death's door is truly life, the original intention of life. It is life fuller than anything we know and comprehend here. Friend that should excite us about the passing from this life.

Please don't get me wrong, I know the enemy is out to kill, steal and destroy. And as believers we are to resist him at every turn. But I have come to realize that we don't LOSE our loved ones to death. When a loved one dies they gain. Death for the believer is not defeat it is the ULTIMATE victory. They are now actually LIVING the LIFE that Jesus paid so high a price for. Isn't that exciting.

I pray that through this blog you will come to know and understand the awesomeness of God. That you would realize the truth about eternity and come to know that George and I were seen through to victory because of Jesus. You must submit your life to Him to walk in that grace. It is powerful. I pray that you realize that GOD'S ways are JUST even though we may not understand them. Lift your eyes to the greater purpose for things in your life. Lift your eyes above your circumstances, lift your eyes and gaze in Jesus' face. When you do, things begin to take on a totally different perspective.

I love you all, even those of you who are directed to this blog or stumble upon it. You are not here by mistake, reading this message by mistake. Get a Bible if you do not have one and open its pages and ask God to reveal himself to you like He did to George. George came to know Jesus as his FRIEND.

Be blessed my friends and let's all live for the greater purpose.
Robin

God is God...

Our God is God and there is no other. Church Sunday was great as usual. The Lord kept asking me do you trust me? Yes Lord I would respond and the question would come again do you trust me? Yes Lord I would respond and again this happened like five times then I felt Him say then just obey me and wait. O.K. Lord. You said you would give me light for each step so I will obey what I know to do now, knowing that when I need more light You will shine it. We cannot allow our faith to be rocked we must stand firm in the midst of things we do not understand knowing that God has all things in control. This life is to be cherished , yes and received as the gift that it is, but we must also realize that at anytime God asks us to lay it down it must not have such a hold on us that we can't look beyond the temporal into the face of eternity. Missionaries on foreign lands may face this consequence on a daily basis, however we must realize that greater love has no man than he lay his life down for a friend. This is not just in the form of dying, it could be your time, it could be letting something you love to do go, in order to do something you need to do for the Kingdom. May the Lord allow us to hold on to the things of this life very loosely so that if we are called upon to release them the struggle won't be so difficult. Deal now so you can be obedient later without hesitation.

The Lord our God is our Provider and just like He made provision for Abraham when the Lord said give up Isaac (the promise), He will continually make provision when He moves upon us to do things for the Kingdom. But the decision must be made to give up Isaac (the promise). Be blessed.

Robin

back to b-ball

Lauren had her first district basketball game Tuesday night. It was great, they went into overtime and at the buzzer Lauren made the winning basket. She was all smiles. Wednesday night she sang backup with the worship team in church. It was great. That really seems to be something God is calling her to do. She has also written many songs and she sings them to me all the time. They are really good, you all will have to hear them sometime.

It was tiresome getting back into the swing of things. School is going full force. I know the time from now till graduation is going to fly. So I am trying to hang on and enjoy every moment.

More later it is late,
Robin

Kansas City....IHOP

We had an incredible time in KC at the International House of Prayer Worship Conference. The kids and I went with several people from church and had a great time with them and with the Lord. We had four days of services and time to go to the prayer room. The Lord spoke to me in the neatest way. In my heart He said, "Are you willing to sit in the quiet--No music, No praying, just listening and waiting. I will speak to you in that place, you will hear My heart and understand My ways. At first you may feel uncomfortable because you are so use to the noise, I want to teach you how to hear my voice. So be quiet, be quiet."

So I went to the hotel room and sat quiet before the Lord. The question came, "How do you know you are hearing My voice?" And as soon as the question came the Holy Spirit gave me the answer. Because your sheep know your voice. So I can be confident I can and am hearing from you. At which point, I felt Him saying,

"George fulfilled his destiny and purpose and has now entered into the rest and joy of the Lord. Your mission now is to live out, speak out, and write out his message of love and peace. I will show you every step of the way,. I will give you messages on death, faith, real vision, reality vision. I desire the body of Christ to see what I see and to hear what I hear. All are not prepared to handle what I see and hear. Although they cry out for it in their songs, few ever take the time to be quiet and hear what I am saying. What I am saying is KNOW Me. KNOW Me. From the place of KNOWING Me, ministry will flow. All things will flow. When Jesus said seek first the kingdom and His righteousness and all else will be added that is what He meant. Seek to know the King of the kingdom and His right ways of doing things then the things you spend so much time longing for will be added to you. Robin, it is not complicated. Just make time for Me. In that place, of you making time for Me I will show you, it will be clear. Only enough light for the next step because I don't want you to get ahead of Me."

Well that was awesome. The Lord and I had the best time. It is great when God desires you to realize how real and precious our relationship is with Him. It is viable, it is alive and He is desiring to move us, show us and use us.

If all that was not enough the last night I had a dream. In the dream George was pregnant. I know that sounds strange but that was the dream. We were excited about a baby although we didn't understand how it happened. I could see the baby moving around in his stomach, I could see the outline of it's little foot. It was so real. The next morning as I was explaining the dream to Cathy, Kayla, and Mary the Lord dropped this in my heart, "There was something alive in George, that will live on." WOW!!! Lord show me those things that were alive in George that you desire to live on. His writings, his passion for Jesus, his passion for life, his love for people.

It is my heartfelt desire to make sure those things alive in George will live on. I can't wait to see how God intends to bring all of this about. I do know one thing it all starts with love. Unconditional, poured out love that is not selfish or self-seeking.

Robin

ringing in the New Year...

The kids and I are attending an awesome worship conference. There is no better way to bring in the new year. The Lord has met us here in an incredible way. Over and over He is ministering to each of us. I am learning to hear His voice. He asked me to go to a quiet place and He would speak to me and oh how He did. I will blog more later on the contents of that conversation.

Don't put God in some religious box, HE wants to be your friend, He wants to LOVE you like noone else can.

More later.

Robin

busy time of year...

I know that life will not slow down until after the new year. The kids and I have been busy, but enjoying each other. Going to ballgames, studying for exams and trying to do some Christmas shopping. I knew this was going to be a hard time of year and it has had its moments. But God is allowing me to find the joy in the season. CHRISTmas is about the beginning of eternal life. The birth of our Lord and Savior and the beginning of all things new. God's new covenant was being made with man. The other day I was thinking of George's actual death, I felt the Lord prompting me not to focus on George's actual dying, but to focus on his eternal life which he is enjoying now. It has helped because the thought of death has finality and regret in it, but thinking on George living out his eternal life brings joy to my heart. I have learned that much of the healing process in grieving is about perspective, it is about a choice. God empowers us to make the choice to see things His way or we can choose to lock ourselves into torment, grief, and unexplainable emptiness. I want to choose the way of life, the way that brings our Lord glory, and when we make the choice the power to walk it out is available.

I love you all. Have a very blessed Christmas and enjoy your families and friends. Keep them close and let them know how you feel about them. Speak it, demonstrate it. Time is short and I know you want them to know how much you love them.

Robin

wow....

The Women's Discovery Weekend was incredible. There were some difficult moments during the weekend but I think that is why God wanted me to be there to aid in the grieving process and coming to grips with the fact that God can truly be my everything. He is able to meet every need and is there at all times. It was good to be on a Discovery Weekend again. It has been three years since I have been involved on one of these retreats.

I led worship, and before one of the session I felt led to share about what our family had gone through over the past two years and give God the glory for His faithfulness. Later that evening a lady approached me and asked if my husband and I owned a rent house and I said yes. Well her sister-in-law rented that house from us for over a year. She was a faithful reader of this blog. One time she printed a story George posted and gave it to her family. Well the lady on the weekend received it and was telling me how God used it to change many of their lives. That was such a God moment. So encouraging. God let me know that He knows right where I am. Every step of this journey is being led by Him.

Robin

hello...

It was a great weekend. Church was awesome and we heard a great sermon. Pastor preached on no longer being under condemnation. It was great.

I have just agreed to lead worship at the Women's Discovery Weekend this weekend. Someone had to step down due to an automobile accident and I got the phone call last night. I am real excited about serving on this weekend looking forward to what God has in store. Please pray for us this weekend if you think about us. God is great in doing what He wants to do. Three or four weeks ago a friend told me,"This next Discovery weekend is going to be powerful and your going to be part of it." I let her know that the team was already in place but I was praying about getting involved again maybe next fall. During the night last night I awoke to her voice in my mind saying what she had told me three weeks ago. I then thought, God you do have a way of getting our attention. I will write more later about the weekend.

Please pray,
Robin

TGIF....

Well another week has come and gone. Time seems to be running faster and faster. We will soon be approaching 2008. It seems like we just brought in 2007. It is so true the older you get the quicker time seems to be flying.

The girls lost their game last night so they don't have to play again until Saturday morning. And it seems we may be done in time to watch the LSU football game. Three more weeks of school and out for two weeks. WOW the joys of teaching. There is nothing like the schedule.

Wednesday night at church was awesome. The Lord ministered to our hearts like only He can. How sweet it is. What do people do that only depend on religion. Jesus is a living, breathing person, He chooses to live in us by the power of the Holy Spirit. Thanks pastor for your sensitivity to the Spirit. Our Father just wants relationship. Plain and simple it is about relationship. Reading His word and just spending time with Him.

Have a great weekend. Get some rest and as George always said go somewhere and worship God.

Robin

busy week...

Well this week has started our pretty busy. An away basketball game, church and a tournament this weekend. At least the tournament is at home. No traveling. Today has been a rather lonely day. I just have a sense of loneliness. Only God can help me with that. I have reminded myself several times that the Holy Spirit lives in me and is as close as the mention of His name. And fortunately, He has helped me through. So many times we want to lean on the arm of the flesh and try to find a person to fill the spots in our lives that God so desires to fill. And many times if we look to Him, He will send people to help us out. That is so much better than us trying to seek out things in the flesh to fill the void. Shopping, eating, and many other activities can fill the time but it doesn't fill the void. Only God can come in and be everything for us. A friend that sticks closer than a brother, an ever present help in time of trouble, a refuge, a shelter, a hiding place, a father to the fatherless, a husband to the widow, so many things He is able to be if we will let him. Thanks for listening, I pray in some way these thoughts minister. Be blessed.

Robin

faithful....

Over the last few days God has been dealing with me about HIS faithfulness. I think back to this time last year. George was doing well, we enjoyed a wonderful Thanksgiving together as a family and we were enjoying the life that God had given us to live. It was easy with George to live life daily and to the fullest because his hopes and trust was placed fully in God's ability to see us through. Oh and how God has seen us through. Each day brings with it new challenges, opportunities to trust God. We have choices to make in those moments. We can become inwardly focused on the problems before us or we can lift our eyes to the hills to where our help comes from. If I have learned anything over the last two years it is that Our Lord will catch us if we just abandon and fall on Him. Our circumstances may not change or they may become worse but in the end we can be held if we just let go and fall on Him. His arms are big enough, His catch is gentle, and He holds on oh so tight. A love like this is rarely understood when things are going well and we don't have to place our dependency anywhere. But when our world is rocked and tossed and turned, we can know that there is a solid place to secure our feet and our faith and that is the ROCK our faithful Father. I know this to be true I am not just spouting off truth that hasn't been tested. I have tested it. It is real. It is solid. Let go my friend and find yourself held in big, gentle arms. There is no other place I would rather be.

Robin

Thanksgiving...

Well we are in the middle of basketball. Tomorrow will finish the tournaments for a while. We will be having Thanksgiving Dinner with my parents and George's mom and dad are coming in to celebrate it with us.

Although life can take a drastic change and we can find ourselves in the midst of unbelieveable circumstances if we cast our cares on the Lord he can sustain us. I have daily lived the provision of that promise. There is a comfort in the Lord that sustains. Also when we look to the things in our lives that we are thankful for it keeps tradgedy in perspective. I am so thankful for my kids, my extended family, my job at Hosanna, my students, the roof over my head, my church, my pastor and his wife, the body at Hosanna First Assembly, my friends, my salvation, eternal life, forgiveness of sin, health, knowing Jesus as a friend that sticks closer than a brother. Thanksgiving---we must be quick to GIVE THANKS it keeps us mindful of God's provision.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving...Don't eat too much enjoy your families.

Robin

ball games...

Lauren's team won their game Tues. Starting tonight she will be playing 7 days straight, two tournaments back to back. As we stay busy with sports we still take the time to love on each other, reminisce about George, and allow the Lord to keep us comforted. Pastor's sermon was so good last night and the presence of the Lord was so rich. I am here to tell you that the Lord can be experienced in a very real way. His comfort at times is tangible and His peace is like a blanket. Thank you all for your continued prayers and know that I am also praying for you. There are many needs in our body at Hosanna and we are a family lifting each other up.

Robin

home again...

We are home after an awesome weekend in Kentucky. The kids and I left Thurs. and drove to Natalie's in Tuscaloosa stayed the night and then we all finished the drive to Owensboro, Kentucky for Oliver's wedding. Oliver is my nephew, George's brothers oldest son. It was a beautiful wedding and we were blessed to be with family. We drove 12 hours straight back. WOW I have never done that before. We listened to CD's all the way home. We made it through 10 1/2 CDs.

God was faithful in watching out for us as always. We serve a big God who is able to keep those things that we trust to Him.

One more week of school and then Thanksgiving Holidays. YEHA!!!!

Later
Robin

hope you had a great weekend.....

WOW The Tigers won and the Saints actually pulled off a win. All that's great but let's rejoice that our names are written in the Lamb's Book of Life. Eternity is real and it is ours. It is our inheritance. The Holy Spirit has sealed us and we are God's purchased possession for that day, the day He comes to take us home. When all seems lost and it seems we have no answers to the craziness going on around us we have to realize that God is still in control. We have to STOP and make a conscious realization that He is NOT asleep, He is NOT on vacation. He is aware and also able to help us in handling our situations. We probably just need WISDOM which He said he would give liberally if only we would ask. I think our problem, most of the time, is the lack of realization that we even need WISDOM. We rely too heavily on past experience and manipulation in order to have things work out how we think would be best. That's the problem however, since we can't see all our circumstances with eternity's perspective we see very short sighted and don't understand how individual events in our lives line up to effect eternity and our future.

Let's consider Joseph. We must really stop and contemplate the events that lead to the salvation of the nation of Israel. That process didn't just have to do with the timing for Israel as much as it did making Joseph ready for re-encountering his brothers. What needed to be done in his life so he could be trusted with all of that authority. That story excites me. The thought of our heavenly Father working so diligently through our circumstances to prepare us for kingdom work. Oh how we miss things because we allow our circumstances to consume us rather than us by the power of the Holy Spirit saying ok God I recognize this as an opportunity to be prepared----do your work in me. Well I need to go more later on this thought.

Robin

This is a pic from Saturday night at the Homecoming banquet. I am trying to get some pics from the Friday that she was crowned. It was an eventful night to say the least. We have slowed down a little. Lauren has an out of town tournament but I am staying home. I will hit the ground running next week with basketball games. We are looking forward to Thanksgiving Holidays and more down time.

We are finishing the 2nd six weeks of school. Hard to believe that 2007 is winding down. What a year? We have to keep our focused on Jesus and the task at hand to do His will and seek His face. That is all I know. Have a great weekend. Go TIGERS!!!!

Robin

Queen....

Friday night was homecoming. Lauren was crowned queen for 07-08. She was absolutely beautiful. Saturday was the homecoming banquet. She went with a nice young man and had a blast with her friends. They hung out at the house until Sunday at 7:30 a.m. I actually pulled an all-nighter. It was an incredibly busy week and now things will slow down a little. Granny and Paw-Paw came in and stayed the weekend with us. It was great to see them as always.

The chickens are in full swing delivering eggs everyday. Yesterday we got 10 eggs from 10 chickens 100% production, George would be proud of his ladies.

God is on the throne and HE is in control. We trust Him daily and lean on Him moment by moment. Stay plugged in to what God wants to do through you.

Robin

pictures...

Soon I will try to learn how to add pictures to the blog. I will post pictures of Lauren's homecoming. Lauren and her volleyball team won their game last night. They play again Wednesday. It will be Lauren's last volleyball game of her high school career. I know this year is going to fly by and there will be many emotional moments. These are the times when missing George is so evident. When there are things he should be at or doing is when the reality of our situation hits the hardest. But the truth of the matter is I would never want him back in the condition he was in. Now he is whole and healthy and his body will never again have to see death. He has made it. He has gone before us. He is where we all desire and long to be. At least that's what we say when we sing worship songs and when we pray. However, if faced with our mortality many of us cringe at the thought of leaving what we know behind. I have really desired my perspective to change and to see more things in light of eternity. I have tried to allow what we have been through to show me the way. How does God want me to handle certain situations, certain people? How does the Lord want me to use the experience I have been through to help others?

I want to see the Kingdom of God advance. Together we can purpose to do that. If we live each day to the fullest and seek opportunities God brings into our path then we can affect eternity in the here and now.

I love you all,
Robin

Kenny...

Well our dog Kenny is now a resident of Alabama. George's cousin said that she would take him and as busy as we are that was the best decision to be made for us and Kenny. We brought him to Alabama this past weekend. he seems to be making a very smooth transition. He will be greatly loved and allowed much more freedom. We are so excited for him.

This will be the busiest week by far. This is Homecoming week and there is much to do and plans to be made. It will be fun and memorable.

Thanks for all of your words of encouragement and your thoughtful prayers for our family. I love you.

Robin

time off...

Well I have taken some time off this week. It has been good to get things done that I needed to take care of. Lauren and I have some much needed shopping to do for Homecoming and next week is going to be outrageously busy. It's all going to be fun though. Homecoming week is always a blast. Volleyball season is winding down. Next week we will finish up with two home games. Wednesday is Senior night. Lauren is the only Senior on the volleyball team so it will pretty much be a party just for her. That little stinker.

We daily lean on the arms of Jesus and He brings such great comfort. Again I send thanks to all of you who are continuing to pray for us. We feel your prayers and know that the Lord is honoring your request and holding on to us. We love you all.

Robin

DESTINY...

This was something George wrote on Monday March 3, 1997:

I have a destiny---that is farther reaching than my own self. I have a destiny that goes beyond my own greed, my own lust, my own wants and my own desires, my own passions. I have a destiny-- that's bigger than racism and bigotry and hate. It is bigger than pride and position, possession, and income and all of those physical and social trappings, we cling to so desperately. Hang on, oh my soul to the one who guides you, the one who made you, to the one who called you. I have a destiny that is not bound by political rule and governmental boundaries or corporate ownership. Even health--good or bad--cannot prevent my destiny. I want my destiny, I need my destiny. I crave my destiny. I have to fulfill my destiny! It is calling to me--I am racing to my destiny--I can see it dimly in the dawn--my heart pounds, my body struggles, my muscles burn and ask for rest-- but I cannot stop nor even slow down, for I must apprehend my destiny. As thirst screams for quenching--my very being thirsts for my destiny--fatigue cannot stop or dissuade me from my destiny. Depression? move to the left, anxiety? move to the right, for my destiny I have in sight. I command inspiration to come and lift me toward my goal. I command passion to come and fuel the long drive towards my destiny. I command persistence to come and assist me in the pursuit of my destiny. I come against any bondage that would prevent the attainment of my destiny--any of the "petty" frivolities that would entangle and hamper the attainment of my most ultimate desire. As minutes turn into hours and hours into days, weeks, months, and years, I seek my destiny. I will not be relegated to the archives of history. Futility, I damn you ---you are a facade. HA!HA! You are uncovered for what you really are! Nothing! Nothing but a deceptive mirage of sorts put in my path by who knows who, to distract me from my destiny. Yes, my love, I will one day embrace you as a child its mother, I am coming for you and no other only you, oh lover of my soul. I hear your whispers in the night, your call in my soul. I see a glimpse of you in the dawn-but only from within the cleft of this rock--when can I come out and gaze fully into your face? Ah yes. I know I must be patient, but please, don't ever let me go, for life itself has no meaning at all, apart from YOU-- may I dream of you every night, and every day let me keep you within my sight. Above and beyond every single thing in life, I must attain my destiny and nothing can stop me, for it is MY DESTINY.

Enough said,
Robin

be patient...

I do desire to write more. I have been running and running. I hope to take a couple of days off next week. God is so precious in His comfort and peace. What do people do that don't know the Lord or that place their hope in religion.

Lauren made the Homecoming court. Looks like we will be shopping for a suit. I am so excited for her. She is a great kid and I want to brag on her. She loves the Lord with all of her heart and desires to do what He wants her to do. She makes incredible grades 3.975 and plays volleyball, basketball, and runs track. OK enough bragging. What thrills me the most about Lauren is her love for the Father.

Bryan what can I say about Bryan. He also makes awesome grades and is involved with sports. He loves the Lord too and has such a sweet heart. He also has a great sense of humor. From George I'm sure.

God blessed George and I with tremendous kids and we dedicated them to His care. Continue to lift them up in prayer, I can't even imagine what they are going through in losing a father.

I'm going to share more of George's writings. Stay tuned.......

Robin

what a weekend....

I haven't written in a while because Thursday and Friday were two rough days physically. I must have hit the breaking point and feeling exhausted. Thursday I sensed I was having a panic attack and my blood pressure was high. I took Friday off and slept most of the day. I probably needed some down time. I am much better now it seems my blood pressure has come back down. I am still going to see my cardiologist to get checked out, but today is better. I went to the LSU game Saturday night with Lauren and some friends that invited us. It was the greatest. I was in calm mood because I didn't want to push it after Thurs. and Fri. I was not jumping up and down on the outside but I was having a party on the inside However, after that is when my blood pressure began to level off.

Yesterday at church was awesome again. Randy Philips ministered. He does human videos. He acts out songs. It was so powerful. I will type more later. It's time for school.

Robin

words from George...

This is a note that I found that George had written on 4/27/04:

When the insignificant turns to obscurity
the life that once was is no longer even a memory
tasks left undone are undone
dreams unfulfilled are gone.

Just a drop of water, in an endless sea
searching for meaning, a desire to be
something other than insignificant
in the pages of history.

A part of the bigger picture, they say
A small piece of the larger whole
consolation this sometimes brings
no matter, that's just how things work.

It has been decided beforehand
things set into motion are to continue.
Is there anything new under the Sun?

When I read these words I was moved to consider what George was obviously considering when he wrote this back before he was even diagnosed.

Lord, I want my life to count for eternity. I want to build on the foundation with gold and precious stones, not wood, hay, stubble, and straw. This life is a gift, a short time to journey make memories, love people and make Jesus known. The constant struggle to have and make is the enemy of the peace of living and keeping eternity in perspective.

I love you all. We have another busy but fun weekend planned. Lauren and I are going to the LSU vs. Florida game Sat. with some friends.

too busy...

We have been so busy I have not had the opportunity to sit down and type what George had written. I am at school now and I didn't want to bring it with me because I don't want to lose it. Hopefully, tonight I will have the chance to sit down and share it with you. So many of you have sent cards and notes of encouragement and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. To hear how God used George in his life and even in his death to bring about change in your lives has been a blessing to hear about. Thanks again and God bless. I will try to learn how to put pictures on the blog like George used to. I will take a picture of our chickens and the yummy eggs.

Robin

hey...

It was a busy weekend. Again church was incredible and the awesome presence of God was evident as usual. Pastor brought the word and how right on it was. Let's not miss what God IS DOING NOW for the sake of always looking to the day of Him moving. I think that is the trap of the enemy to keep us ever looking, never finding or seeing what we believe God wants to do while all along He is moving in our midst and we don't have the spiritual eyes to see what is happening because we want to see things in the natural. OPEN OUR EYES LORD!!!!! There truly is a spirit realm which happens to be as real as our own three-dimensional realm, our natural eyes can't see but that doesn't mean it doesn't exist. We are spirit and we worship God in spirit and in truth. WOW what would worship be like if we could see in the spirit realm. Would angelic beings be dancing around us and ushering our praises to the throne room, would demonic forces be fleeing seven ways knowing that they have no authority, is heavens door open and those who've gone before looking through to earth to observe those they loved on earth singing praises to our GOD. Of course all of this is speculation and none of us really know on this side of heaven what happens, but I believe if we desire with a great hunger to know more and understand more then more will be revealed. We're hungry God and only You satisfy.

Yesterday I found something George wrote in 2004 I will post it tomorrow. WOW

Robin